The Crooked Path To Simpson BBQ

Once again, I will share some of the amazing search terms that brought people to my humble BBQ & beer blog.

The most popular entry, by a very large margin, is my tutorial on how I turned some unsightly industrial refuse into the ugly drum smoker known as Big Blue. The next two are my parboiled pork ribs (I’m sorry, BBQ world) and my experiment with cedar planking rainbow trout.

After that, it’s a random mixture of BBQ or beer-related posts. My plea to eliminate the kicking game from fantasy football is a top 10 blog post. A lot of people hate kickers…

I doubt anyone reads these search term posts – they’re just really amusing to me to write. On to your search terms:

“drinking beer accelrates male baldness” – Dear God, is that true?! Explains a few things, though.

“indian casting couch hardcore” – Excuse me, what? Did a search engine really bring you here? And this person abandoned their search and clicked on my blog! Horny to hungry that fast.

“olive oil lube” – Is this the same guy as above?

“bell’s oberon mini keg directions” – (1) Open, (2) Consume, (3) Recycle.

“bell’s oberon ale mini-keg trouble shooting” – See above.

“my lager is pale” – My appetite is whetted

“where can i get large 55 gal metal drums” – I think you mean “where can I get CLEAN NON-TOXIC AND/OR FOOD-GRADE large 55 gal metal drums.” Be safe.

“what can you put on pecan wood to stop it from creating smut on the chicken you cook?” – I got all of that except “smut”. What the hell are you talking about? I like smut, but on Cinemax after 11pm, maybe with some BBQ & beer. Smut on chicken sounds weird, inedible, and illegal.

“what pork rib resembles a chicken leg” – A mutant one?

“abandon bbq pits” – Now I’m a little sad… I need to be cheered up.

“crying ku fan” – ha ha

“todd reesing grass in helmet failure” – bwahahaha

“awful bbq food” – I direct you to this post, my friend.

“what to wear booze cruise” – Great question. It all depends. Are you a member of the Minnesota Vikings, or some random guy from the Midwest on your honeymoon? Is your boat leaving an Arab country, or Jamaica? Lots of variables here.

“what part of the cow does fajita come” – Flank steak is common, but I’m sure many cuts are suitable. I’ve heard beef tongue makes amazing tacos and fajitas. I just can’t convince anyone in my house to eat it if I make it.

“big flats beer” – One of my favorite blog entries.

“jesus smoking ring joke” – I haven’t heard that one. Now I’m curious… may have to do my own Google search.

“simpsons bbq kiss the cook” – Thanks, but I’m married.

Don’t think I’m mocking my random readership. I genuinely enjoy learning how every sub-literate pervert finds this site.

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