One of my favorite blogs is Popehat. I check it daily, if not more often. The authors provide rather brilliant snarky insight on topics I find highly relevant, such as first amendment rights, frivolous lawsuits, bumptious legal threats, effluvia, and general asshattery.
Amongst the finer features of Popehat is the semi-regular Road to Popehat series, where the authors detail the absurd search terms that bring people to the site. Rather than try to mask my copying of their theme, why not simply replicate it as a genuine homage?
I present the Finding Simpson BBQ. These horrific search terms genuinely brought people to my humble blog.
“fish smell bottom of BBQ” – Unless you have been cooking fish sans plank, you have a serious problem with your grill
“a long time ago we’re back in history where all we had to drink was nothing but cup of tea” – Pre-beer technology? Horrible thought.
“what porter to drink with brisket” – I like the way this guy thinks.
“simpsons triva night kansas city” – I would make the 3.25 hour drive for this event.
“why should i hate ku” – I think the real question is why should anyone NOT hate KU?
“cookingwithhickorywood” – Typingwithnospaces..butyeshickoryisawesomeforcookingmeat.
“scammers & scum” – This makes me smile inside.
“ustro trademark scam” – again, this makes me smile.
“where to get pork ribs in dc” – No idea. Ask my brother.
“ku sucks” – True.
“ku suks” – Uh, true?
“can you smoke venison ribs” – Yes, and I aim to do so soon!
“what does lawyer invoices look like” – Complex, vague, and expensive.
“honey nut ichiros” – Mr. Suzuki… General Mills is on Line 1 with a marketing opportunity.
“خوخ شجرة” – Uh…..
“Beer” – YES!
“parboiled pork ribs” – I’M SORRY, BBQ WORLD!
“simmsop bbq” – Nope.
“simpson bqq” – Not quite.
“simpsons bbq” – Close.
“simpson bbq” – That’s it. Good work, Mom.
Apologies to Ken & Patrick. Imitation is the greatest form of flattery.